Solitude

no more shall the morning see me
waiting for word from the lands beyond
that made the rays warm and the skies blue
intertwined with the chirping of the birds
for the birds now shout when i hear
the words and the heavens grow angry
and dark and swallow up the sun
leaving me in a darkness so dark
i cannot even see the tips of my own fingers
and so quiet the weeping of my heart sounds
like the mighty rush of a hundred waterfalls

no more will i trust your words
for they bring me memories and sorrow
no more will my ears ring
with the hollow sounds of denial
for they bounce around in my head
and cause me pain as great as
the sight of a thousand trees falling
down at once in protest of something they
hold so dear, as the air i breathe
and the earth that i walk on

i choose solitude as a better death than
the death that’s passed on to me by you
as if to say, here, pass it on to the
next one you think that deserves it
for i am done with it, i have found my peace
and i will call upon you when in doubt
and whenever i feel the need
no more will i cherish your laughter
that i put as the gatekeeper on my chest
to unlock the devils and the angels i hold
for i will leave the doors wide open to
everyone who wishes to see and share
the marvels that each of us have within

free of spirit and of health and of reason
that is where i came from that is where i go
somberly realize, the in-between may have been
just in passing, although it was aglow
with lights and fire and sounds so grand
it would put the birth of the sun to shame
for still, I know we’re each born alone
and each we lie on our deathbeds in solitude
and the void is all that remains,
forever the pillar, forever the strength, forever lasting.
-by Lex Lapax (07/09/2003)

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